Leadership mentor

These Are the Five Attributes of Highly Successful and Happy People

If you’d like to be happier or more successful this year, then ask yourself if you’re truly exuding these five attributes. The happiest and most successful people I know execute on these game-changers exceptionally well.

Key Takeaways

• Practice exuding vision, compassion, passion, accountability and courage, and your life is bound to improve.
• If you haven’t been doing one or more of these things and start now, you’ll be shocked at how quickly others around will notice and appreciate the changes — for both your personal and professional relationships.

During my 21 years in corporate America, I spent thousands of hours observing others.  Now, as a coach and consultant, I often get asked what attributes I value most in people — and these five stand out.  If you’re looking to achieve new levels of happiness of success this year, consider how well you embody the following five attributes. Not only do they drive success in leadership, but they drive success in life.

1. Vision

Humans have a gift that no other living organism has: the power of imagination.  Successful, happy people use this gift.  They imagine a compelling and different future than the present, and they believe in their ability to create and shape it.  They don’t reactively accept the status quo or things they don’t like. Instead, they work hard to improve the world around them.

They recognize that they have agency and can proactively alter their surroundings and environment.  They never say things like: “That’s just the way it is” or “We’ve always done it that way.”  Instead, they imagine their desired or ideal state and then compare that vision to their actual state.  If they identify a gap, they immediately begin devising possible solutions that will close that gap.  Then, they get to work in employing and experimenting with those.  People like this show us that anything is possible, and they’re fun to be around because they tend to inspire us to do the same.

2. Passion

We all have unique gifts and talents that excite us tremendously.  Time flies when we use them.  We tend to be better at them than our counterparts.  They come more naturally and easily to us than others.  Thus, we’re able to hone and improve our skills at a rate faster than our peers.  Doing these things feels more like play than work, and we can hardly believe that someone pays us to do them.

Life is too short not to invest in yourself.  We’re most successful and happy when we identify what unique gifts and talents we have, and take the time to practice them.  Not only does this help us feel fulfillment and joy, it allows us to best serve society.  Many individuals experience burnout, anxiety and depression because they spend 40 hours or more a week not doing what they love.  When we engage in activities that energize us (instead of things that drain us of energy), we’re not only happier, but we’re healthier.

I’ve had a few jobs I didn’t like and my life suffered while I had them.  I felt drained of energy when I arrived home.  I struggled to find the motivation to exercise and pursue personal hobbies.  I gained weight and lost touch with friends.  When I got back to a job I loved, all this changed.  I became a marathon runner, reconnected with friends and pursued personal hobbies like photography, scrapbooking and writing. Focusing on what we’re passionate about is incredibly important.

3. Courage

Fear is a powerful motivator.  Research shows that our brains all have a subconscious component that works to protect us and keep us safe.  Many of us hold back and live life with the brakes on because we’re afraid of change and trying new things.  We have a fear of being uncomfortable, making mistakes, failing or facing judgment from others.  Courage sets us free.

As Franklin Roosevelt said, “Courage is not an absence of fear, but rather the assessment that something else is more important than fear.”  Courage allows us to speak our minds in the board room, express our true opinions, suggest unconventional courses of action and go against the status quo.  This is what allows us to progress, develop and innovate.

It can be scary to speak up.  But, it’s important.  The right people will value your bravery; not squash it.  Having the courage to be vulnerable, authentic and transparent gives other people permission to do the same thing.  Going against the grain and inciting real, honest dialogues when others can’t or won’t usually doesn’t hold you back, but helps you progress, especially if you’re in the right environment.

4. Compassion

When we empathetically hold space for others, we free them from their own fears and worries.  Compassion allows us to create a safe space for others to be themselves, and that’s when people are most able to contribute in a meaningful way.  Our spouses, families, and friends aren’t the only ones who appreciate compassion.  Our employees do, too.  When others feel valued, appreciated and seen, they give us their all.  They do their best work and deliver their best ideas, which is what helps us move forward.

Over the years, numerous employees have thanked me for being so kind and understanding.  They’ve told me how enjoyable it is to come to work when they have a boss or colleague who truly cares about them.  Sadly, compassionate leaders are somewhat rare.  If you’re one of them, you stand out and this breeds a tremendous amount of loyalty and respect.  When people respect you, they’re more willing to push through challenges and find solutions for you, which means you’ll get better results.

5. Accountability

It’s amazing how much traction you create in life when you keep your word.  The most successful people I know always do the things they said they’d do.  They regularly keep their commitments, including the ones they make to themselves.  Over time, people notice.  This breeds a great deal of trust.  When you take responsibility for both your behaviors and the results, you’ll work harder to find solutions in the toughest of circumstances.  When the buck stops with you, and you don’t blame others for your problems, you save a tremendous amount of time.

Most people spend an inordinate amount of time finding scapegoats and assigning fault to anyone but themselves.  This behavior prevents us from getting better.  People who are truly accountable stay focused on their circle of control, not their circle of concern.  Therein, lies all the difference.  Whether you’re leading others or just leading yourself, accountability is what makes progress possible.

The 7 Qualities of People Who Are Highly Respected

Leaders are judged on their results and respected for how well they treat people.

Respect is something not automatically given.

It must be earned.

When you’re in a leadership position, it is imperative that the people with whom you work respect you.  They might respect your work habits, your intelligence, or your ability to close a deal.  Yet, there’s more to respect than that.  If you can earn their respect as a person, then you’ve really won the game.

Here are some tips for earning more respect.

1. Be polite.

Always be polite to everyone you meet during the day, from your family members to your co-workers, to the checkout person at the grocery store.  Give others the same respect you’d like to receive yourself.  Seek out actions you can take to offer politeness.  Open the door at the coffee shop for the person behind you, or let the person with one item go ahead of you in the grocery store.  Say please and thank you whenever possible.

2. Act respectfully.

Eliminate disrespectful behaviors such as rolling your eyes, interrupting or talking negatively about someone.  Not only are these actions not respectful of the person you’re interacting with, they deter or prevent further involvement or resolution of issues, and create a wedge that can become permanent. Instead, foster an environment of respectful listening.  Everyone deserves to be heard, even if you don’t agree with a person’s views or opinions.  Consider how you’d like to be treated if you have something to say, especially if there is an important issue at hand.

3. Listen well.

Listening is an active process, not a passive one.  Think before you speak.  Most often in today’s conversations, one person’s comments “trigger” thoughts in the listener, who then brings forth their own story along the same lines. Instead of telling your tale, ask questions that encourage the speaker to tell you more.  Most people will be flattered that you care.

4. Be helpful.

People earn respect by always being ready to lend a hand or an ear whenever they’re needed or notice an opportunity to help.  Look for opportunities to help that you might have previously overlooked.  Does a co-worker need help with a big project?  Can you grab a cup of coffee for someone?  Strive to be helpful several times a day.

5. Don’t make excuses.

Your actions are based on your choices, and barring some unforeseen circumstance, there is no reason for excuses.  Own your actions.  For example, if you’re constantly late, don’t make lame excuses.  Own up to your mistakes and instead of dwelling on them, look for opportunities to move past them and do better next time.  Instead of focusing on your shortcomings, ask, “How can I rectify my behavior or situation?”

6. Let go of anger.

Holding on to anger or a grudge doesn’t hurt anyone but yourself.  If you get upset, allow yourself to be angry momentarily, then move on and either rectify the situation or put it behind you.  Give yourself and others a break. Forgive, and then forget.

7. Be willing to change.

Being intractable won’t get you anywhere.  Realize that the process of evolution includes change.  Make an effort to grow as a person; learn new skills, try new activities, and especially, re-examine your automatic behaviors.  And don’t forget to congratulate yourself on progress you make along the way to becoming a better person.

5 Easy Ways To Find A Leadership Mentor In 2024

If you look at the lives and careers of some of the world’s most successful people in business, you may observe that they share something in common: they had the support of mentors.

Take Oprah Winfrey, for example. Her mentor was the acclaimed poet and author Maya Angelou. Or look at Mark Zuckerberg, who had Apple co-founder Steve Jobs as his mentor.

Both of the above furnished examples showcase high-achieving professionals and leaders within their industries, who started out their multi-billion careers as novices (comparatively), but became wildly successful while under the guidance and support of a mentor.

What Are The Benefits Of Getting A Leadership Mentor?

Utilizing the support of a mentor, especially within your workplace, can have numerous benefits.

First, your leadership mentor can introduce you to their network, which is essential for spotting and securing new business or career boosting opportunities as an aspiring leader.

Because they are able to at least briefly observe you in action within the context of your work environment, your chosen mentor can better identify your areas of improvement and work with you to strengthen your skills and improve strengths. Their context-specific advice and support can also prove to be a strong motivating factor when facing difficulties or setbacks at work.

Finally, they help you achieve your leadership goals through being your accountability partner. Your meetings with them can be seamlessly integrated into your mutual work schedules if you have selected them from within your organization. They don’t even need to be formal. Sometimes these meetings could be quick catch-ups for a coffee break or in the staff canteen. What might be a timely 5-minute check-in via a Teams call, could prove helpful in boosting your confidence before making a critical decision.

How Do I Find A Mentor?

No doubt, you’re reading this article because you already are aware of at least some of the benefits of having a leadership mentor. But what if you don’t currently have one? How can you identify the best leadership mentor for your career aspirations and current professional needs, so you can progress to the next level and have a trusted ear and wise advice to count on?

There are several places you can go, online, and in-person, to find a suitable leadership mentor. These can include:

• LinkedIn groups and network referrals
• In-person conferences and networking events
• In-house mentoring programs offered by your current employer
• Your university’s alumni network
• Professional membership associations

What To Look For In A Leadership Mentor

Locations aside, there are three essential criteria that you need to ensure are ticked off your checklist when evaluating and selecting whether your mentor relationship will be a good fit:

Colleagues discussing project at workplace.

1. Rapport

Do you feel comfortable with your proposed mentor? Will it be a healthy and understanding working relationship? Are you both easily able to strike up conversation and do you feel comfortable confiding in them? This is an essential first step as you won’t experience the full benefits of your mentoring relationship if you don’t feel relaxed enough to be transparent so you can obtain the help you need.

2. Expertise

Your chosen mentor should have relevant and extensive experience within your industry ideally, and as a leader. This is because they will be able to relate stories from their own experience of their ups and downs, and lessons they’ve learned. This can prove useful for you so you won’t need to repeat the same mistakes they made when they started out in their leadership career.

This is one reason why selecting a mentor from within your company is a bonus, because they likely would have worked there for many years, so they know the ropes—not only of the industry and market—but specifically of your organization.

3. Communication

Communication skills are the essence of successful relationships, and especially is this vital in the case of a mentor/mentee. You should be confident and satisfied that your mentor is able to communicate with you clearly and with empathy, and that they are able to deliver constructive criticism.

They should not be so “nice” that they are afraid of telling you the truth and tend to sugar-coat their advice, but you want to ensure that they always have your best interest at heart, and that they frame their feedback in a way that enables you to grow.

Once you have identified these characteristics in your chosen mentor, reach out to them and ask for their support. You may find in some instances that it is best to obtain the support of a leadership coach, who usually would charge a fee for their sessions with you. In other cases, you might be easily able to identify a successful leader who is willing to lend their time, free of charge, as a mentor.

It’s up to you to weigh up your options and decide what works best, not only for your budget, but for your overall leadership goals.